1. |
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
02:42
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i’m still counting the dust on the floor of my car
and you can’t be mistaken
you know that i’m all out of time, out of time
i still think i catch glimpses of you from afar
have you loved him the way that you said in my arms all the time?
all the time?
colder suddenly
shoulders cuddled, we scolded time for its coming and going too fast
oh, fast, but why did you run away?
how could you-
do you still want to feel like the girl we all want?
yet the birthdays you wait for, just words on your wall
and i can’t believe you always thought loyalty was boring
and i roll down the window
blow smoke, watch it fall
did you know how it feels to feel nothing at all?
it’s so perfect
haven’t you heard yet?
the state of the world’s too ugly to face
i still drink like i dream, too fucked up to chase it
the blasphemous joy, how’d you lie in my arms?
i found purpose that autumn, twelve seasons have fallen
the years are all copies, just green in my cartridge
they crowned you the victor, made monsters so heartless
i can’t hate that sunset
so fuck who you want
i don’t care if you’re gone
do you know how it feels to feel nothing at all?
maybe it’s time we all go home
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2. |
future retrospect
02:26
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come the morning, i’ll bleed
schism, psychopath, sea
vision blurry, retrospective in the future, i’ll see
this is more than i’ve been wondering
the silhouettes come rushing over me and we-
and i don’t know which way i’m supposed to head till i’m fucking dead
yeah, won’t you open up the doors and find me in the rain
had this feeling since i met you in 2008
i was sinning in the back, at the front selling lemonade
play with strings, carbon copies of my energy
for what it’s worth, i’m (psychopath) fun
it all could be yours
the moments and the words
listen, i’ve been, yeah i’ve been here before
so don’t expect that fault to fall upon your shoulders
i can see it all in your face
only raindrops in the end
but i gave you all i’ve got and still you left me nothing, yeah
i guess that’s all you are, you’re clearly nothing
that’s all you, that’s all you are, you’re clear-
that’s all you, that’s all you are, that’s all you
that’s all you are, yeah
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3. |
showering with spiders
02:57
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hey father,
i’ve been meaning to call you
i’m sorry i’m not happy often
and the days have felt so heavy
but you told me, “just come back home when you’re ready”
well, i’m ready
no wiser, i’ve been showering with spiders
it’s silent
i’ve been so unguarded
oh, the fire has long extinguished
and you’re tired of watching all your fears
burned out
oh, what a way to say goodbye
no pain when you’re dying on the inside
gold flames burn brightest in the moonlight
old names still fade when you hold on
still wanna die young, so i smoke some
and the city don’t sleep with the lights out
running too fast, i’ve been dying to get out now
so dazed, never felt so safe, no
so amazed, never wanna wake up
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4. |
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you’re caught in the sunlight, you’re fast asleep
when the morning comes, i swear i’ll follow your footsteps to fit your dreams
and the light streams through the air
we could’ve been alright
it feels the same, no change cuz everything feels like
you said i’m unhappy cuz i’ve been scared to be more than what’s in my head
i’ve fantasized about poisoned nights
trust me, you’ll love it
it’s like falling asleep, waiting for the feelings to fade to nothing
yeah, i can see it all in your face, only raindrops in the end
but i gave you all i’ve got and still you left me nothing
we should’ve been alright
it feels the same, no change cuz everything feels like
cuz everything feels like shit and all i wanna do is love you alone, with courage
but time hurts
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5. |
kthxbye
04:18
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sorry that i like to say you loved me
and if these moments are my last
sure, i wish you’d come back
you’ve been away all summer long and i called to feel so empty
so if the poison fills my glass, sure, i wouldn’t mind that
so when the tides are violent, will you follow me into the water?
washed down the darkness
and will all the pain fade out the moment i jump through, just like you promised?
just like you promised
i’ll wait for you to come
i’ll wait until the day i don’t feel numb
i can’t say i love you, they’re just words on the phone
and in the moments i thought i might’ve, it felt so bad
and in my mind i know it’s no sense
the path behind me snow-drenched
and time ahead so hopeless, and nothing ever works
still i feel the same: sure, i hope you miss that
so when the tides are violent, will you follow me into the water?
washed down the darkness
and will all the pain fade out the moment i jump through, just like you promised?
just like you promised
i’ll wait for you to come
i’ll wait until the day our lives are gone
not till the bitter end has mine just begun
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